in a bad way: an all-around enchanting experience.. i want to preface this review by saying that i am not any kind of food snob. i love diners and breakfast restaurants. heck, one of my favorite foods is scrapple. so understand going into this review that i didn't have any outrageous expectations or any axe to grind about diner-type-places. i generally love them. this place, not so much. spoiler alert: the feelings i had while i was not enjoying my breakfast for over 2 hours made this devolve into angry social commentary at times. i tried to still provide thoughtful insights that will help you choose whether or not to eat here.
i seem to have some time to kill so i've started my review while we are waiting for our food. i'll start by discussing the service and atmosphere. we were told to expect a 30 minute wait when we got here. we were seated after about 50 minutes, but whatever. then our order was taken pretty promptly, however we have currently been waiting for our food for about 45 minutes. to be fair, omelettes take a really long time to cook so i... no wait, i'm thinking of some other food. omelettes take about 4 minutes to cook. i can't fathom what is taking so long. the place is busy, but unless there is literally only a single cook, cooking each order one at a time, this is straight nonsense. at least we are at our table now and it's harder to overhear the super loud conversations that the hipsters near us in the waiting area were having: "oh, i really like to write short stories about my cats! i call them my 'pride,' my 'pride of predators.' you were an illustration major? no way that's crazy! maybe you could illustrate one of my stories and i bet we could totally submit them to a magazine that would publish them together!" this was a small part of a 30+ minute conversation, but i'm sure there's a character limit to this review and i'm just getting upset about it again, and i need to watch my blood pressure. being from pennsylvania originally, i had never before encountered new england hipsters. it turns out that their baffling self-importance is actually more boring than i was used to. what a learning experience!
there were also a lot of loud, dirty townies with tons of children running around unattended. so i guess the place is "kid-friendly." maybe this is important to you. just as a general aside though: if you aren't able to control your kids in public, you should stay home or at least properly sedate/restrain them because otherwise nobody wants you around. to me, cosmic omelet was a perfect storm of the two things that i least want when i go out for breakfast: really long waits and terribly annoying people.
if i was trying to put a positive spin on the decor, i'd probably say that it's "eclectic." in reality the place is only "decorated" in the technical sense that someone attempted to decorate it and there was a result. it looks like they started putting stuff on the walls in the early 90's when they painted the back wall black and made some sort of space scene with an alien holding a fork. there are also a few framed posters of planets. that's where the "cosmic" motif pretty much stalled out though. there are some random old concert posters, country home store paraphernalia ("bless this mess" etc) and some dusty mugs and steins bewilderingly hung on a row of hooks along one of the walls. any one of the several styles would work fine on its own, but the combined effect is just that of half-assedness. there's a single unisex bathroom and it was pretty nicely painted with a scene of the cosmos, but the surfaces were nasty enough that i'd suggest not touching anything if you can avoid it.
the food was fairly priced and honestly not bad, but for a place that specializes in omelets, they make pretty crappy looking omelets. i got the country club omelette, which was good but had too much honey mustard. it came with hash browns that were nicely seasoned and the toast was standard toast. my wife "built her own" omelette and one of the components was cream cheese. personally, i'm not that big of a cream cheese fan anyway, so i think she was setting herself up for disaster. i would have guessed that they would maybe incorporate it by spreading a layer over the other components to hold everything together or otherwise mixing it with the other ingredients. not the case. they just cut like a third off of a block of cream cheese and stuffed it in there. it was pretty easy to avoid getting a mouthful of it though because the omelette was constructed like no other omelette i've ever seen. it seemed like they took a thin layer of eggs and cooked it into a tortilla-like sheet and then wrapped or stuffed the other ingredients inside of it like an open-faced burrito (see picture below of the omelet as it arrived at our table!). this seems like a really inefficient way to make an omelette, but i'm not an omelette expert. i'd say i'm an amateur omelette enthusiast at best. maybe this added craftsmanship is what took them 45 minutes to accomplish.
so overall the food was decent, but not worth 90+ minutes of your time. i think they must be aware of their inability to cook and serve food at a reasonable pace, because every table has a sticky deck of cards to help you kill time. that's clever in a "we don't care if you have a place to be in the next couple hours" kind of way, but there's a denny's up the street, so just go there if you want breakfast.